Change Your Thoughts... Change Your Life

This is the first article I wrote that was published, 

back in 1999. 

The lesson remains an universal truth. 

Change Your Thoughts                          Change Your Life by Gary Loper Have you ever wondered why some people achieve goals, dreams and aspirations, and others do not achieve their heart’s desire? Are there times in your life when things show up unexpectedly… like a phone call from someone you were thinking about? Would it surprise you to know that your mind has the ability to attract into your life what you think about? The tricky part is getting your thoughts and your desires synchronized so that your achievements, your dreams, and your aspirations materialize out of your own thoughts. The first step in changing our life patterns is to realize we are responsible for our own thinking, both negative and positive.  Earl Nightengale once said, “You are where you are in your life because this is where you really want to be, whether you realize it or not.”  This is a powerful yet scary statement.  How can I be here, if this is not what I want?  Here is where the personal responsibility comes in.  You have free choice!  Knowing that your life reflects the sum total of all your previous choices, create your thoughts to create a new reality.  If you do not like what you see in your life, take full responsibility for your thoughts, make different choices and realize your dreams. The next step is easy.  Remove all your negative thought patterns that sabotage your goals.  Remove all the “not’s” from your thoughts as well as from your vocabulary.  Send clear and concise messages to your subconscious.  As a body worker and personal coach, I have found that many people do not realize how negative their statements are and how much this negative thinking interrupts their ability to achieve success.  For example, when asked about what they want in a relationship, they will start by telling me what they do NOT want.  “I don’t want a jerk.” Or, “I don’t want a drinker or smoker.”  What kind of people do you think usually come into their lives after making such statements?  That’s right.  All the types of people they so fervently stated were not the ones they were looking for. What they don’t realize is that anything following an “I” or an “I am” statement is considered a command to the subconscious.  The message the mind hears is, “I want a jerk, drinker, and smoker”.  The subconscious mind does not differentiate the negative from the positive.  It remembers whatever is introduced.  When we bring into our minds contradicting statements, we create a reality that contradicts our desire.  When we say such things as, “I want to be well.  I’m so tired of being sick” or, “I want to lose weight.   I will never be a size 8”, or, “I want more money.  I do not want to work that hard”, we might well be sending out conflicting messages.  No matter what we do, our reality does not change. As human beings we limit experience based on our ability to describe the experience.  Because we ask for things we want, it is important to be clear in our messages when asking for something to come into our life.  I heard of a woman who asked for a husband.  She attracted other women’s husbands! Perhaps if she had asked for someone she could marry and share a life with, she would have brought into her world a different reality. We have control over our conscious thought.  The old adage that you are, what you eat, can truly be applied here.  YOU ARE WHAT YOU THINK.  The way you see yourself has a lot to do with the way your life is.  While we usually are our own worst critics, it is wise to remember not to be so hard on ourselves. Remember that nature created you perfectly and YOU have talked yourself out of it. So, in order to start changing your life, you must first change your thoughts and words.  The subconscious mind will create whatever you think about, just as a garden will grow whatever you plant.  The garden does not care if it produces weeds or flowers.  If you choose to plant flowers, here is a formula for creating your desires.  Envision something other than your own current reality.  Simply create a clear picture in your mind of what you want.  The clearer you can be, the easier it will be for your dreams to become reality.  Get all your senses involved in the process – vision, touch, taste, sound, and smell.  How will this reality look? What will be the taste?  What sound will I hear?  What are the smells? Try these steps. 1) From what did not work in the past, try to discover what you really want.  In other words, discover what would be the opposite of your present created experience.  For instance, if you are now meeting jerks, your opposite reality would mean that you want the opposite of a jerk, a gentleman. Turn your thoughts upside down for a new perspective. 2) Look around for examples to define more clearly.  Remove the negative images, people, movies, advertising and jobs. Stay away from the negative images and the bad news that feeds our negative thoughts.  Emulate friends and family who have achieved goals.  Seek examples of positive relationships and events all around us that can spark a glow and desire in us. In every aspect of life, studying past performance helps to develop plans for the future.  As in the computer technology, “garbage in, garbage out”, our subconscious mind is our hard drive and keeps exact records of past events.  If you do not like the recurrence of past events, then you can do something different.  It is useless to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results.  Our desires are budding realizations of who we really are and what we really can become.  I challenge you to start doing something different to move towards your goals. Take the smallest of steps, but do something every day that will reprogram your hard drive.  Little by little you will see your thoughts bring a new reality into being. The universe will then be working in harmony with you to bring you all you deserve. *** Take responsibility – you have made all the choices so far. *** Take the “nots” out of your vocabulary – think only of what you want. *** Get in touch with all your senses to describe what you want. *** Realize that you are entitled to fulfill your dreams and desires. When your thoughts match your desires, it becomes much easier for the universe to bring you its gifts. *** Take steps – a little every day to move closer to your realizations. *** Trust that the universe will bring it to you in a way that is a win-win for everyone involved (Let go, Let God)

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new blog post: Spring Cleaning, Life Reflections of the Soul by Caryl http://ping.fm/PSkNd

The important thing is not to stop questioning.

Albert Einstein

Spiritual Spring Cleaning, Life Reflections of the Soul

By Caryl Loper

March 20th, ushers in spring, a time of renewal, growth, change and life reflections. It is the occasion to reflect into the pool of one’s soul, to expose and unsheathe the inner core of one’s being, to challenge oneself to internal growth, to start anew, fresh with pure delight that change can be a celebration.

It is a time to renew and reinstate one’s aspirations, hopes and dreams, to fulfill one’s destiny. Spring is the season of greenery, a brightness of mass appeal that echoes out life and beauty.

Go within to reveal and revel in the beauty of who you are, paint your life with wide brush strokes of yellows, greens, pinks and oranges that illustrate the magical essence of your being.

So often we simply forget who we are, where we are going and why, and tap into self doubt, anxiety, worry, despair, loss of hope, loss of self-fulfillment and self-actualization.

When the outside world spins, what appears as spinning out of control, know that all circumstances essentially are created for inner growth, and our only demise is the echo of the ego that rehearses and reiterates what the mind states we have lost, what we are
incapable of and how we have not achieved our goals.

In reality, the only control we have is our inner perceptions and how we react to the outer influences. Engage yourself in self-stroking, positive reinforcement and appeal to yourself with such thoughts that all present experiences are simply opportunities for soul growth.

Once you can achieve this awareness, walk this walk, your life becomes more in balance. Create a healthier perception and you not only entice a wellness within; likewise, you project a sense of well being and your outer persona radiates self-assurance, peace and harmony, appreciation and gratitude for life’s gifts.

http://garyloper.com/aboutuscaryl.htm

To Thy Known Self Be True

I have sent a lot of energy over the past 15 yrs entrenched in personal development. So many great coaches and mentors, sharing what has worked for them and how it would impact my life to emulate their patterns.

I have taken it all in and have been overwhelmed at times, hearing something delivered with so much power that I was ready to cut my hair , shave and purchase sport coats, thinking that was the missing piece. I was lead to believe by some, that people are threatened by appearances that are different then their own. The message was to conform.

Then two days after watching a video of a well known speaker driving the message of a suit and tie, I received another video, the other side of the coin you might say.

In this video, I saw a guy, who looked like me—after a day at the beach, promoting a high price package sitting behind a table with the box of stuff in front of him, many times covering his mouth with his hands or the product. The over casual approach and body language raised my buttons and I turned it off with out ever seeing the entire clip.

This alarmed me that I was put off by someone who looked closer to me than the suit and tie guy. Was I secretly afraid of his look and did not want to trust him? Did I need to move closer to the “other side” to gain acceptance? More confusion arose when I learned that the long hair guy , reportedly sold millions of dollars of product in just a couple of days with this clip.

You can never say the wrong thing to the right person or the right thing to the wrong person.

What I learned was to thy known self be true. Trying to fit in to another view of what is easier from them to handle , will lead to inner turmoil, always chasing for someone’s approval.

No manner what we are promoting, the real product is you. People will be drawn to you and your personality and values. There are a huge number of things people are looking for in any relationship—personal, or business—there is more than enough for all without trying to clone one another as the only way. Systems and duplication are important but need to be tweaked depending on the audience.

What has worked for you ? I am interested in learning from your experiences in being true to yourself and creating a public image that people are drawn to.

Second Chances

Last week I heard that Michael Vick is due to be released from prison this summer and the reporters were discussing why he should be given a second chance to play again in the NFL, some saying that this is a country of second chances and he deserves the right to work/play again. It seems that the reporters have lost sight that it is a privilege to play in professional sports or any other celebrity type job. The accounts of the crimes against dogs are absolutely horrible – even to those without pets. This may be a thought from left field, but I have heard no one makes the connection to others in prison for committing murder often have “practiced “on animals. I hope that is not the case with Vick, do we ever really know what lies beneath the surface of another. I feel that, although a little unfair, an example needs to be made here. If the owners do not see their responsibility to send a message of quality people performing for us, then the public should demand that we should not have to endure the low qualities of those in the lime light. Should Vick be reinstated I will stop watching and following the NFL entirely, a huge step for a lifelong Packer fan.

To whom much is given, much is expected. Every day we are asked to accept more and more of people making decisions that affect the lives of others in a negative way, only to get a slap on the hands and given a second chance. Example: the banking industry, Wall Street, insurance. Every day the news tells us of another story of someone’s greed for personal gain has cost thousands of people to suffer financial and emotionally. A higher price needs to be paid so those taking short cuts and poor and unethical choices, and learn to suffer the same as those they have affected. The CEO, CFO etc should all lose their jobs and golden parachutes. Why should they be trusted again and given a bail out loan to right the ship they ran aground?

The same of athletes and celebrities, their talents should not be given a free pass to everything else we all face each day should we make the same decision. We often live our lives through the characters and performances, is it not time to demand a higher standard from ourselves and those we allow the stage – through our buying tickets, merchandise, music, etc Why are we supporting things that we do really not want in our lives and homes, much more influencing the minds and actions of our children ?

When we make better choices for ourselves and think before hand how they will impact the lives of those we love, others cannot help to see a different way. There are many parts of our society that have more challenges than others, but when did taking short cuts and hurting others insure a way out. We all have made more than enough decisions that did not turn out as we hoped. Have we been given a second chance by those we unintentionally hurt? Many times no. Personal forgiveness seems to be much harder to get than what is provided and demanded by athletes and corporate leaders and willingly given by the masses.

I hope that in raising our standards for ourselves and holding others to the same and driving ourselves each day to be a better person, one by one, the world will change into a much more loving place. When we can move past the personal pains and allow our loved ones another opportunity to share their lives, true healing begins and everyone’s life is better for it.

Create an excellent day

Suggested resources
Bob Burg, speaker, author of the award winning “Go Giver” A Little Story about a Powerful Business Idea. (that crosses over to every part of our life)
http://www.thegogiver.com http://www.burg.com/


Bo Short, speaker author. “Living to Win” Five Key Enduring Principles of Success
http://www.LeadingWithImpact.com http://www.BoShort.org

Welcome, Gary's First Blog

Greetings

Thank you for finding me and taking the time to read my thoughts. I hope to share from the very deep pool of knowledge and mentors I have acquired through out my life and dream that you will find it useful to perhaps help you and the other people in your life.

My background, experiences and interests are varied providing a unique approach and perspectives from nontraditional and traditional thought and molding and applying it to fit each situation. I will also be sharing our products and services helping you Look, Feel & Live Better, helping you make an informed decision.

More will be uncovered as we progress and I wish to learn from others along the way and invite you to share feedback that will help us all grow.